Sh*tty Mom for All Seasons: [email protected]/*
Mary Ann Zoellner, Alicia Ybarbo, Erin Clune
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
The authors of the New York Times–bestselling Sh*tty Mom are back with a hilarious guide presenting common parenting scenarios with advice for getting through the year the sh*tty mom way.
Told in the same tongue-in-cheek voice as the original, this sequel is full of funny parenting tips and relatable stories for contemporary moms. Sh*tty Mom for All Seasons explores the occasions throughout the year that test every mother’s patience and inspire self-deprecating humor and that second glass of wine. With chapters organized by season, the book will teach you how to navigate the bumpy roads of motherhood, learn to laugh at the occasional parenting fail, and maybe even appreciate your own mother. Or not. Sample chapters for the sh*tty mom year include: • Fall: “Yes, We All Have to Be Here: The Annual PTO Funsraiser”
• Winter: “Mom’s Real New Year’s Resolutions”
• Spring: “I’m Running Off with the Gardner: April Fools!”
• Summer: “Summer Reading Lists & Other Great Reasons Why You Don’t Home School”
The Emmy Award–winning TODAY show producers and self-proclaimed sh*tty moms, Alicia Ybarbo and Mary Ann Zoellner, together with humorist Erin Clune, bring you the perfect book for mothers who don’t take themselves too seriously.
Tongues frozen on flagpoles. Wishbones. Sitting next to the same person every day at lunch is totally awesome, unless your kid turns out to be the smaller half of the broken chicken bone. BESTIE OR BULLY? What does that B in BFF stand for, anyway? When people say the word bully, you typically think of boys who steal lunch money or throw short kids in the trash can. Girls, on the other hand, have “drama.” This sexist assumption isn’t much better than when women were diagnosed with hysteria, and
Middle-of-Nowhere, Florida! It’s quiet, residential, adjacent to a nature preserve, and includes membership to an adults-only golf course. For older people, this place is perfect. For parents with small kids, it might as well be the epicenter of the zombie apocalypse. There is no school playground. There is no ice-cream store or laser tag. There are no places to go at all, other than the strip mall anchored by a Kohl’s, and the marsh, which may or may not have alligators. After nearly contracting
that car alive, you can’t be raging on the interstate. Here’s a list of safe people to scream at when you feel it coming on. 1. Starbucks barista. Or as you call her, the Starbucks fascista. You’re at a rest stop on the highway. Does she really need to see your license with your credit card? When did Missouri turn into East Germany circa 1972? Take her down. No—first take your coffee, then take her down. 2. Truckers with girly wheel flaps. The only problem with yelling at these guys is they
School so You Can Get Back to Life 23 The Neighborhood Carpool: Moms Do the Math 24 Braving the Bus Stop: A Field Guide for Anxious Moms 25 It’s the Fall Harvest: Get Ready to Pick a Crap-Load of Apples! 26 Making a Healthy School Lunch Every Day: Never Gonna Happen. Don’t Even Bother. 27 Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell: Speaking in Code When You Meet the Teachers 28 Who Ruined Halloween? Pretty Much Motherf*%king Everyone! 29 Nothing Is Funny at 4:30 a.m.: Coping with the End of Daylight Saving
focuses on the process. Please stick to matters relevant to our entire community. Thank you. No, Stickler Mom, thank you. RANDOM-ACTIVIST MOM This mom doesn’t really hear your anxiety about holiday shopping. Because whatever you said—blah, blah, blah—reminded her of a political issue she feels strongly about. Folks: I don’t know about cereal or sheep meat. But I did read an article recently about the newly protected status of sardines. How about tuna fish this holiday season? Random-Activist